Saturday, 31 May 2008

A little warning...

My poem is based on an article that caught my eye in a newspaper, a poor guy from Australia needed to stop at the side of a road to answer, "the call of nature", lets just say, the consequences of this little stop must have caused his eyes to water somewhat...

Driving through the long dusty road,
Suddenly feeling the urge to go ,
Why hadn’t he gone before he left?
Realising now, this might have been best.

Through lack of sleep from the night before,
His eyes so heavy, would they hit the floor?
Drinking plenty of coffee to keep him awake,
He cursed himself at this stupid mistake.

The problem made worse by bumps in the road,
How could he follow the highway code,
No choice in this matter he had to stop,
Praying to God he would not spill a drop.

He jumps out quick looking at the distance afar,
No sign of any people or sight of a car,
Crouching down by the side of the road,
He thinks he’s found the perfect place to go.

While the call of nature takes its course,
He starts to scream his voice becomes hoarse,
Something had slithered between his legs,
“What is this thing?” this thought he dreads.

All of a sudden this thing shows its face,
It lunges at him in a very awkward place,
With long sharpened fangs it holds on tight,
This Eastern brown snake, is ready to fight.

A few hours later in his hospital bed,
Doctors’ words running around in his head,
This kind of snake has venom that kills,
Lucky for him, it hadn’t learnt these skills.

Though very painful his *ahem* is intact,
He’s learnt a lesson and that’s a fact,
If ever he needs to answer the call of nature,
He’ll cross his legs and wait ‘till later.


polona said...

yikes... that's a cruel one but in a funny way :)
the guy sure learned his lesson...

Double "D" said...

Nice one Stacey, you made me laugh
and smile and cringe all at the same time.
I'll bet this guys wife won't be seeing
his "ahem" any time soon.

P.S. Kind of cheeky there missy!

Sam!! said...

:) i dnt hv words now to praise ur writing skills.. nice humorous poetry..

God bless you!

Janice Thomson said...

How funny and painful at the same time. Great poem Stacey!

cyclopseven said...

Poor guy. Wonder what attracted the snake to his 'ahem'. :). Good write.

Aleta said...

LMAO -- that was too funny. OMG. We women think Men have it easy with being able to stand and "go" but for this poor fellow... OUCH!

I have a funny story to share about Greg, but I think he'd be upset if I posted for the Internet world. Really is a good one though! Thanks for the laughter.

Unknown said...

LoL! Stacey... quite hilarious..I liked it very much..I never knew you had a sense of humour like this... congratulation... love kunjubi

Nefariousoutlook said...

funny!! and yeah poor guy (lucky though!!)

i am sure the person will be very very careful next time he has to reaaaaly go :)

Lyric4Verse said...

I like your sense of humor in this one too, Stacey...Rex.

Contessa ChiChi said...

YeowieOuchie! You made me laugh and squirm at the same time, Stacey! I think I might have nightmares tonight. I've come upon 2 snakes in my house over the last several years and I still walk around with eyes behind my head. Even though I don't have an "ahem" the whole visual here makes me feel a little light-headed. As usual, you spin a well-written poem from an interesting subject.

p.s. Just as an aside - I read earlier of a man who built his autistic grandson an internet browser he can navigate. If you're curious here's the link..:)

Zac's Browser

And don't be confused by my name & avatar, it's really me!

Janet Leigh

Stacey said...

Thanks Polona, ohh I think he reallyyyy did learned his lesson.... ;-D

Dear Doug, thank you so much, you had better watch out for those snakessss (LOL)...the poet spinner does have a little cheeky side to her... ;-D

Hi Samrina, really pleased that you like my poetry, thank you very much :-)

Thanks Janice, I should imagine it was veryyyyyy painful, glad I made you laugh with my poem :¬)

Cyclopseven, thank you, not sure what attracted the snake to his "ahem", but I can bet he wont be making the same mistake again (LOL) ;¬D

Hi Aleta, glad I made you laugh, and that you enjoyed this...hmmmm, don't tell me Greg had the same encounter with Mr.Eastern.brown snake????? (LOL) ;-D

Kunjubi thank you..glad you like my humour :)

Hi Nefariousoutlook,Yes I think this poor guy was veryyyy lucky,and next time he has to reallyyyy go, he will make sure he goes before he leaves home(LOL);-D

Hi Rex, really glad that you liked this one...and that you enjoy my "sense of humour", thank you ;-D

(LOL) Contessa chichi...aka....Janetleigh,
If the "whole visual" makes you a little light headed, can you imagine what it did to this poor guy...OUCH (LOL), glad I made you laugh..
Thank you for the link to Zac's Browser..Its really appreciated, I will have a good look into it. :-D

Raffy Jay said...

That's mean. But hilarious too. LOL

K.C. said...

Yeah, that is a tough situation. Poor guy. Funny poem.

Thanks for your words of encouragement on my blog. Those are the ones that are keeping me going... KC

Dan said...

Very funny, Stacey! Perhaps a case of mistaken identity. The real snake may have perceived his 'ahem' for a potential rival encroaching on his territory.

Stacey said...

Hi Raffy Jay, glad I could make you laugh ;-D

K.C, You are more thank welcome :-D

(LOL) Dan, never thought of that one...maybe it was a case of "mistaken identity"..(LOL)

Anna said...

Hi, I have a couple of poetry blogs and a poetry website and I was wondering if you would like to exchange links.

I've placed your link here at Poem Poem Poem and at
Free Poems .

I also have a blog called Your Poems Your Stories where you can log on and publish your own poetry if you like.

Anonymous said...

Hahaha!! I nearly fell off of my chair when I read this. Another poem written so well

Carol said...

Stacey,that was funny, and I could see that this would happen.. Being an Aussie myself I have run across the fearless aggressive brown snake..and also other deadly snakes.. But most will run, however not the brown or the the death adders they will strike with vengeance I am very surprised that this poor fellow survived at all..Picnicking many years ago with my young family at the time, we did not realise there as we sat and ate a red belly black snake was joining us..It wasn't until we all moved they it too decided the picnic was over..Fortunately it was just as frightened of us as we were of it.. It took off to the hills one way and us the other way.. And recently here in the heart of the Parramatta city Park which is about 15 k from the Sydney, we were once again greeted by a red belly.. I took quite a few photos of it as it dove into the river..I'll post them onto my captures in a few days.. It was about a 8 footer..

Stacey said...

Hi Anna, thanks for adding me to your great poetry blogs, I would love to link up and have added you as a link to my blog, thanks for visting me ;-)

Hi fern,thanks for visitng me, glad you enjoyed this poem :)

Hi Carol, gosh...I am so glad that we don't have to worry about snakes over here.........
Yes this guy was very lucky, the article that I saw about this, stated the same thing...
I will keep an eye on your site, for when you post your pictures of the 8 footer red belly, though I am glad that I am seeing the snake as a picture and not in real life(LOL) ;-D

Anonymous said...

Oh Stacey, that one did make me laugh and my eyes water. Val in Spain